Kittybomber’s Neighborhood

my new beret
Originally uploaded by 100kJ

its my new protective style along with the head scarf. also i bought a new shirt at the highly overpriced wastelands i suggest buffalo exchange better selection for clothes but for shoes i say stay they have sizes for smaller feet. the beret was from planet funk. berets are damn expensive. fuck that i will knit my own. going to get myself a pattern and figure it out. learn to sew/knit and viola i have a knit beret

&ne

I just deleted/removed my entire neighborhood here on Vox.
Meaning, this is the end of this blog...

I have been evaluating people's (from real life friends to online friends to even some family) intentions a lot lately and realized that i should be more careful who i let into my thoughts/personal space.

I always try to see the good in everybody and do the whole innocent before being proved guilty thing, but truth is, not everyone has the best intentions.

Blogging to me had always been a way for me to offload things that i have on my mind. Thus, my blogs had always been very personal, which is why i always kept it "friends only". I've never tried to force my opinions or mannerisms on anyone else, i just keep true to myself and write what i feel/my thoughts and whats going on in my life.
But the comfort level of doing that had been breached lately when i started to realize the judgmental and combative nature of some folks. I realized that i may not be the "conventional" blogger or even person, but i am me, and well, thats all i can ever be. I will never try to fit into anyone's mold or bend myself to impress anyone.

People are always going to be judgmental of things they do not understand. It not only calls into question their true character, but exposes their insecurities, because lets face it...if someone was secure in themselves and their decisions, there will be no need/use for turning up their nose at others.

I had a lot going on with this blog and i opened myself up to quite a number of you, but maybe some people can't quite keep up/understand, and you know, thats perfectly OK. Not everyone can be everyone's cup of tea in life. =)

I have been quite privileged to have met/interacted with quite a good number of pretty good people through my blog mediums, be it xanga, livejournal, vox or myspace, so all is not lost =). I do hope that i would be able to continue building those good relationships with those kind of people.

To that extent, i have started a new Vox blog (because i didnt want to delete this one since it has a lot of content archived). I figured its always good to start on a clean fresh start.

So, if you are interested in still reading from me, add my new blog to your neighborhood.

But please please please, do not add me if you:

• Are any form of judgemental or combative... understand like i mentioned before that not everyone is going to be everyone's cup of tea...if you don't like me or what i say/do for any reason, please do not add me. Trust me, it wouldn't give me any sleepless nights =). I have never solicited comments/adds from anyone, and have always left the choice of readership to the reader....that's never going to change.
• Never read me/comment... i've never in my blog life been starved for comments, but i just dont see the point of adding someone who you never read or comment. I understand that i do write long blogs, because hey, i have a lot of thoughts and ideas...and thats me! If thats not your cup of tea, trust me...i wont be offended. =)
• Only want to see my pictures. I say this in the nicest way possible, please just visit my website if thats the case www.may83.com. You can view all the pics to your hearts content there.
• Are only interested in reading me talk about fashion/celebrities/music etc or other impersonal things. I say this also in the nicest way possible...there are sooooo many blogs out there catered to that medium. My blogs have always been of a personal nature. Maybe i may touch upon those things occasionally, but thats not all that encompasses my life. If thats all you want to read, you will NOT enjoy my blog and please do not add it.
• Act holier than thou... please please take that somewhere else. Thats never been how i've been and thats never going to be anything i appreciate or tolerate.
• Are a generally negative person. I know everyone can not be positive all the time, but if negativity if your forte, there's no need to read me, you'll just be annoyed, because well...i am a very positive and optimistic person. Thats just how i've always been. If you think i live in a fantasy world for that, its ok. You have a right to your own opinion, and i have a right to remain who i am =).

Yeah i consume too much foods and drinks with high fructose, dextrose, and fructose.  Its going to be hard since i relapse my will is weak. I need to loose fat . I am not overweight by any means. far from it. But the thighs be chaffing. TMI. i know. Avoiding too much sugar is hard i get withdrwal. I am not so much into whole food market trend thir food is  scary . i ate from the food bar it bothered my stomach the whole day.  Few of their foods are bland and dry. Hella overpriced. They sell pupusas for $3, ludicrous i get mine  Downtown for less i think less than two. its been a while and i took two generic antihistamine similar to benadryl. love you benadryl. Where was i, the sugar restriction is because my face is just wonky from drinking soda in high amounts almost everyday. I will be sleeping early and not gt so stressed about work. i overshoot my time so tired from being sleep deprived that i dont think well.

why do people say think straight? i will go into deeper thought tomorow.

Don't You Evah

Going to work tomorrow . Work is a bore. So i will document my travels. I will live blog. I wish i had a smart phone with a qwerty set up. Damn i am starting to want a iphone but it will not be worth it. But still i have an artificial lust. So here is the game plan.

This was a letter sent to a site called gawker. They were asking for advice. It did sure rang a bell especially " You're starting to sound like an ex friend of mine who cursed everybody out and sent F-U letters to everyone who didn't attend her graduation party. That is childish." yep thats my self-centered self. damn

"Dear No Long an It Girl,

I know how it feels to be an outcast and to feel like all of your friends just dropped off the face of the earth. It happened to me! (Damn, what hasn't happen to me?) Before I wrote my book, I hung out with a whole bunch of females that were considered popping. As time went on I became more serious with my goals and hate drove us all apart. So I know how it feels to start back to square 1.

You also said that in high school you weren't very popular and that's why sometime now you need attention. One thing I must tell you is, don't make excuses for needing attention because believe it or not, everyone needs attention. I would be mad too if I was the "it" girl then one day I woke up and had no emails or comments on Myspace. It will bother a lot of other people too so don't beat yourself up about it. Another thing is, you can't live your life off of what you didn't have in high school. You have to work on moving on from that time. So what you weren't popular? Imagine if you had been, you would have even more problems than you do now. Yeah you would of have had the "has been" disease. So brush that ish off, immediately.

I don't know why but it seems like something in this email is missing; for example, what happened that made people not like you? Like did a certain situation go down with one girl and then everything went downhill from there? Like what exactly happened that made you turn from a hero to a zero in other people's eyes? That's the first question you must ask and answer for yourself. I personally think that not being in the loop is one of the best things that could ever happen to you because maybe it was time for you to create your own social scene. Maybe before you were just an accessory in someone else's world and now it's time to make it your own. Just like when my ex-friends and I separated; I felt bad but then I said fuck it, they are out of my life for a reason. And that reason was so I could grow as a person and meet other new and exciting people. Yeah they were starting to bore me...

I took that time of being socially alone and rebuilt myself and my surroundings. I looked into myself and figured out what happened with my old associates and what I did wrong in the situation. In my situation, it was my mouth. Most of my friends couldn't deal with my personality. I was the type of girl that if you asked me a question, I would tell you the truth no matter how bad it made you feel and a lot of people can't handle that. So oh well, friendships are like relationships, you have to hang around people who love you for you. Hell, it's their loss.

You are right, I do think that you shouldn't worry about other people and go out there and do your thang but I know that that is easier said then done. I think you should just think about it like this. Forget all of the bullcrap from the past and meet brand new people. Hey, you can even start on Myspace or go join an organization that interests you. Meeting new people will help you start all over and then go out there and do you. So what they didn't come to an event you were throwing last year, get over it! No one owes you anything. You're starting to sound like an ex friend of mine who cursed everybody out and sent F-U letters to everyone who didn't attend her graduation party. That is childish. You said that the people you once hung out with left a nasty taste in your mouth, so you don't need to be back hanging out with them anyway.

Believe me, once they see you got your swagger back and got yourself a new and improved crew, they will be dying to get back into your world (whether they admit it or not)... And if none of this works, come hang out with me and my new crew.

Peace Out!
Tionna Smalls

P.S. You definitely need some friends when you start quoting Superhead (that means you have too much time on your hands, lol)"

It great that someone els has the same problems but it doesn't help until someone say it.oooooh burned. i burned myself?

I have to get a new state I.D.. but i figured i guess i should get the good ol' license. Apprehensions about driving. Do i have faith in the people teaching me nope. People have faults but i don't care i don't really believe in the ability. For one if it was important a little effort on their part would be nice. There is no car available there use to be  and plus i do not want to pay for car insurance. Si guess i do not want the privilege because those time i did drive it sure as hell did seem the other people on the road did not care as well. I don't mind walking to much but i really do wish i has a bicycle  that was a little more comfortable to ride. I am rust on the bike but i can say i never forgot. But it is damn uncomfortable

i think pastor benny hinn is a hot piece but back to what i was talking about

cars. yes. Driving not that hard. unnerving is people who they have somewhere to go that is important but i don't give a shit. If it was that important you would have left earlier . To hell with you. If some one is not moving as fast as you want them to tough shit, cool down. i say that because i have been on the other side. Unless they are doing something illegal or actually holding traffic back  quit your whining. jeez. You know what i hope you get a ticket. ha. okay that the mean in me. no i don't want you to get a ticket. but really shill with the road rage that is not healthy or safe  take your problems out somewhere else be dramatic.

All you drivers out there, this is to you, the many drivers in Los Angeles driving at any given time......you all scare me.